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c_r_e_a_m83
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Location: New York, United States
Birthday: 11/7/1983
Gender: Male
Interests: baseball, basketball, weightlifting, workin out, computer programming, chillin.
Expertise: pimpin.
Occupation: Computer related
Industry: Computers (Software)
Message: message me
Member Since:
8/4/2003
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| been a minute since the last time i posted something. i'm still
jobhunting. still on that paper chase. i registered for all my classes
in school. taking bio 150, chem 100 finance 111 and bio 105. 12 credits
of school and 8 credits of hell. especially bio. not many people got
faith in me to do well after i pulled of a C in 102. but truthfully 102
was a difficult class-i wasnt pulling my weight in lab and i got a 66
on the final so a C was in order. i finished with an A in
communications which is straight. hopefully an A in all my classes this
semester to prove my doubters wrong.
i think i'm also gonna start working out. i look and feel like a
damn fat slob. even though i'm not fat per say i'm definitely
getting to be on that chubby side. especially in the face-and we all
face fat is the hardest to get rid of lol.
GOAL #1 for the next 2 months-pay off the credit cards. i've got about
1500 left on those bitches and it's high time i payed em off.
completely.
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| i started job hunting. i realized that i cant stay at chevys much
longer. the new manager is a dickhead. the old manager is a
dumbass. nothing good can happen when dick and ass meet. not to
mention the fact that nobody comes in anymore. i'm lucky to make 60
dollars on a good nite nowadays. i figured i'll get an hourly job
and bartend on the side somewhere once or twice a week. now as
far as getting that steady hourly job it's tough. i hope lowe's calls
me back-15 an hour and full benefits. even if i work part time
over there i'll still be making more money than i would at chevys.
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| i once was told that G-d doesnt put you into a difficult situation for
no reason, that at the end of the tunnel there is a light and he doesnt
test you on more than you can handle. today i found myself questioning
that. i went to see my grandfather in the hospital. his
alzheimer's has progressed to the worst stage possible and as i'm
standing there i'm thinking to myself why G-d, why Lord why my
grandfather, he had nothing but love for you, my family has nothing but
love for you, why put him through this? i have no answers. i cried
later. i often find myself dissapointed lately. i feel like a giant
dissapointment. i think it's because i am. i was given alot of
opportunities to excel and i passed on em, or i started trying to take
advantage too late. story of my life.
truthfully i dont have much to live for and i dont have much to offer
to this world. it's not suicide talk, i'm not that weak that i
would kill myself but i'm just being a realist. today i realized
we are nothing but a speck in the universe. one man cant do
anything. and one failure doesnt stand a chance. whatever though, keep
on trucking i guess.
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| damn man, being a bartender aint all it's cracked up to be. it's tough
work really tough. at least in chevy's anyways, first off i gotta take
care of the customers at the bar-which is a given, then i have people
calling ordering to-go orders which is str8 but none of the servers get
my to-go food and then bitch when i cant make service bar drinks. oh
and in the mornings i gotta take tables too. so it's like 4
things all at once. nights i dont worry bout taking tables. but
last night was crazy stupid. i had the enite fall softball team
come in, the entire fuckin bar was packed-and this was only my 2nd real
shift without a trainer behind the bar. so obviously i was pretty much
thrown to the wolves. they tore me a new one back there. overall i
stunk it up pretty bad last nite but what could i do. people telling me
that i need experience and i'll get better-i hope they right.
it's thanksgiving break this weekend so i'm happy bout that-no work
thursday, friday or saturday for me so i'm free for 3 days in a
row. plus no school after tonite, till next monday so i'm happy
bout that shit too.
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| i guess shit really does have a way of workin itself out. either
for the better or for the worst it shapes how u will act on ur future
decisions. my b-day was str8, i went up to ac with some friends. that
girl in my class is no longer in my class, she dropped i guess. i
got a 74 on that bio exam. and an 86 on this one that i took today. so
i'm at an 82 average in lecture. and like a c- at best in lab. i really
need to pull my lab grade up. that's what i'ma work on these next 3
weeks. at least bring it up to something respectable. at
work i got bumped up to bartender. i appreciate the opportunity. lot of
things that fell in place for me to get bumped up-like 2 bartenders
leaving, 1 getting fired. but i'll take it.
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